Wednesday, June 21, 2017

Foreclose My Car Loan?

I just talked to someone about my "car loan" and how I was going to be "foreclosed on" if I didn't immediately provide them with three payments using my credit card. Seriously. I started to laugh as I told him that they already took my car following my seventh DUI. I said if they wanted it they could talk to the local sheriff (sorry Ted) because after I totaled it and not having ANY insurance it was in their possession.

He believed me, but told me that it was going to be "foreclosed on" again and I asked him if the people foreclosing on it would visit me because I was lonely. I asked him what he was wearing and if he smelled good and there was a noticeable pause. 

I proceeded to ask if I could move in with him, and I then told him we could share a bed but I did have severe flatulence and I liked to cuddle and the pause continued. Somewhere in the next sentence as I began to ask him about goats he began screaming at me in a language that I cannot identify because I was now laughing so hard I was almost crying.

He told me I was a disgusting pig and hung up on me. Was it something I said? We had a great conversation for TEN minutes and then BOOM out of left field he begins screaming . Weird.

Wednesday, January 20, 2016

Congratulations! You have been awarded...

As I trod through my emails every day I am constantly reminded how stupid many people in this world believe Americans are.  Daily I read emails that outline in no uncertain terms that this is the case as the strangest requests pop up.  I often wonder if Al Gore would have ever invented the internet if he had the forethought to think that "phishers of men" would troll the international waters that he created.

I doubt it in all honesty for the simple fact that the "bark buddy" didn't invent it in the first place but if the people that DID create the "world wide web" could have ever thought that it would become the puddle of evil it has become.  To prove my point I stand fairly confident that everyone has seen the garbage that fills Spam folders and inboxes and its a safe guest that at least once even YOU have opened one of those emails to see what it is.  Although some of you may have interest in low cost Viagra or pills and potions that "enhance" men its a safe bet most of you just find it annoying.  The problem is the emails that fill our inboxes are not always innocuous and the seek those that are weak.

The weak I speak of aren't those that need "enhancement" (you know who you are), rather those that fall prey to those that can exploit them and their shortcomings (seriously you know who you are).  What I mean by that is those that are limited by experience, or perceived need or are that type of person that is susceptible to the "three card Monty" scam, elderly, lack common sense or have some type of mental issue.  Confused?  I understand so the best example of those conditions are three emails I received today.

Example #1:
I think this example is best defined as the "Lottery Scam" and I don't mean the Powerball or State run lotteries.  These scams are best defined as "Congratulations! You have been awarded..." (neat title I should use that some day) when you have been blindly awarded something that you never signed up for. So when I saw the title "BMW LOTTERY DEPARTMENT" the shields went up and a smile overtook my face.

The email was typical of these scamming bastards, telling me from the start it was a scam by adding "NOTE: If you received this message in your SPAM/BULK folder, that is because of the restrictions implemented by your Internet Service Provider, we (BMW) urge you to treat it genuinely and kindly move it to your inbox." to the very FIRST freaking line.  These pinheads are basically warning you that your email provider knows its a scam and sent it as such to your SPAM or Trash folder but it gets better.

If this really was from BMW do you think they would have the winner notified by a BMW email or by "foxmail?"  If it took you a minute to come up with that answer never go back on the internet again, EVER.  While that should be a red flag of the scammers stupidity the fact that in the FIRST LINE in the body of the letter they have a serious misspelling that should be as conspicuous as the "foxmail" issue.  I know this email is supposed to come from Los Angeles but come on, saying the "United STATE of America" really?  Trust me this type of letter from BMW would have been reviewed innumerate times and that would have been caught AND it would have come FROM BMW!  It is of certain curiosity that it is apparently important that they tell me the "BMW Lottery" is approved by the "British Gaming Board," why is that important to me, you just told me that you know I am a resident of the "United STATE of America" therefore a moot point.

Grammar and syntax should be blatant red flags as well, BMW isn't going to hire "Willy the Window Licker" but when you read the email its obvious they haven't a clue as to writing in English.  But the best part of this email is the fact that they ask for information about "Nationality," "Present Country" and my favorite one "Email Address."  They just emailed you, they have that freaking information.

Example #1 - The Lottery Scam

Example #2:
The "Random Kindness of Foreign Governments" could be my favorite of all of the scams out there, so it becomes example #2.  The interesting thing about this email is the fact that it comes from a email that could look legitimate.  The possibility that this email could come from an apparent company or governmental agency can take a person off guard for about a millisecond and if its longer than that then that person shouldn't be allowed to drive, vote or even hold small children.

In this example the sender tells us that he received your name by a "commercial attache from your country's embassy in Abuja Nigeria" so a couple of red flags immediately pop up.  First of all we aren't told who that attache is and although we are told that person is from "your country's embassy" they don't tell you the name of the country.  Why is that important?  It is of significant importance when you think that they don't say the "American Embassy" or whatever country you live in because it isn't proper.  Here we go with that talk about grammar and syntax you're thinking but it is not something a person of some import would not get wrong.

The next glaring issue with this scam is the fact that the "author" of the letter is "Engr.Williams Ogerugo Olisa" a man who according to the email has skimmed off funds in a government corruption scheme.  Why is that important you ask?  Well its pretty simple, "Mr. Olisa" has broken the law in his country, even explaining the reason he is sending ME the money as he states: "For obvious reasons, I cannot deposit this money in any bank account in this country or invest it here, so with my influence and contacts, I have successfully placed the money in a security vault Safe Keeping company as money owned by a foreigner. I want to quickly move this money out of this country for joint investment with you."  What that tells me is that I too would be breaking the laws in Nigeria because I would be complicit in the embezzlement of government funds, transferring those funds internationally and in essence laundering the money for Mr. Olisa.  I don't know about you but one of the last places I EVER want to be put is a prison in a foreign country.  I've watched enough episodes of "Locked Up Abroad" to know my hind end doesn't want to go there.

Despite all of that one of the most curious parts of this scam is the fact that this person states:

Your role will be:
  1. Act as the original owner of the US$48 million
  2. Receive the $48 million in your custody
  3. Invest/Manage the funds as joint investment until i am retired or resign government work
Here is a total stranger, offering ME $48 million dollars and although he knows nothing about me, he wants me to invest / manage the funds.  Think about that for a minute.  If this were indeed legitimate would a total stranger want me, a total stranger, to invest / manage the money however I felt appropriate?  I seriously doubt all of that, why because it doesn't make sense.  If this were real and I received that money, I'm gone and Mr. Olisa will never find me.

Unlike Example #1 this person doesn't ask for any personal information but he does provide a telephone number that I can reach him. By calling this person he can now get tons of personal information, including where in the heck I actually live.  He can harass me, scam me, steal that personal information and although I didn't call the number I know that he would try to harvest everything he could and probably request that send THEM money to send me the money.

Example #2 - Random Kindness of Foreign Governments

Example #3:
The third example of a scam is "The Random Kindness of Our Government and Other Entities."  This one is maybe the most devious of the scams if not for the simple reason that highlights our trust in our own government.  People that perpetrate this scam really should be beaten with hammers because this one can really mess with people.  Trust in the government isn't the most popular right now and when you get an "official" email it can trick you very easily.

Never fear, however, because the first clue that this isn't from Uncle Sam is the fact that the email address it came from should be an immediate stopping point for the validity of the email.  In this email it looks like the email itself came from the "Office of the Vice Chairman of the Federal Reserve Bank" BUT if this were indeed the case it would have come from an official .gov email and NOT from "safety@thaitec****.com" as this one did.

If that isn't an immediate point of contention the sender decides that they must tell me that these funds are coming to my "hour of compensation and actualization has come after our meeting with the United Nations, Bank of America, Central Bank of Nigeria and the Federal Reserve Bank officials" which is as forceful as a boot to the head as it tries to prove to me its validity by using respected agencies and banks as a source of proof.  Unless you are a complete narcissist ask yourself why would any of these entities talk about you in some sort of "special meeting."  Of all of these entities talking about you only the "Bank of America" would make sense IF and only IF you were a customer and you owed them large sums of money.

The last issue that should immediately make you suspicious is very simple, they ask for TONS of personal information.  I think that anyone that tries any of the scams is a piece of crap but when you so blatantly attempt to harvest this much information the perpetrator should be thrown into a lion enclosure covered in honey and raw meat.

If I'm being honest if you fall for someone, ANYONE, asking you to send them identification numbers like your Social Security Number, Drivers License Number or as they did in this one, "Your id or international passport" you almost deserve the nightmare that will ensue.  Look I understand that someone that you think you can trust is requesting this information but being as blunt as I can NO ONE, no governmental agency, no bank, no credit card company will EVER, I emphasize EVER, ask you for these things by email.  EVER.  Did I state that properly?  EVER.

Example #3 - The Random Kindness of Our Government and Other Entities

All of these scams and all of the others that are floating around out there are vile, and I really don't want to make light of the situation so despite anything that I said here please remember that these people don't play around.  If you give them even an inkling of their ability to scam you, they will try and try to make it happen.  The most important thing you can ever do is delete these things when they get delivered to your email, treat them like spoiled milk and throw them in the trash.

There are steps you can do to help yourself avoid becoming a statistic with these fine people, they take little time but that lost time can save you never ending headaches.  If you receive an email asking you for personal information look at the source first.  If it isn't from a trusted source like your bank immediately delete it.  If it claims to be from your bank (or another trusted entity) and they are asking for personal information, call the entity directly.  Make sure you DO NOT click any links or use any phone numbers contained in the email, they can lead you straight to the scammer.  Look up the number in the telephone book, or look for the number in a browser such as Yahoo!, MSN, etc. then physically call the bank and ask them if they sent that email. If the email is from a law enforcement agency like the FBI or a governmental agency take the same approach.  Look up the number and call the agency, DO NOT click any links.

Emails from "law enforcement agencies" should be reported to your local police agency and they can tell you the appropriate steps to take to actually alert the correct agency.  Make sure you never click any link in an email if it comes from a person or agency you don't know, its not going to end well and in fact your computer could be infected with a virus, spyware or even open your computer to those people that want to steal your identity.

On a side note people that do this to innocent people are reprehensible and should be prosecuted but unfortunately for many countries the crime is not a big deal and even worse it isn't something that would cause an arrest let alone extradition.  I hate these people, I hope that they get carpal tunnel and severe athlete's foot and creeping crud.  Crabs and fleas would be too go for these people, but just don't fall for these scumbags.

There I feel better now.

Sunday, October 26, 2014

Football Celebrations

Football at its core is reminiscent to the gladiator battles in ancient Rome.  Gone are the swords and other weapons yet the chest armor and helmets still remain.  Gone is the inevitable death yet the terrible injuries continue.  Gone are the men fighting wild beasts to the death yet teams of men battle with the names of wild beasts such as Bears, Bengals, Lions and Rams continue to battle in spectator filled arenas.  Although I am not an expert on the gladiator games of old, I would think that after a gladiator slew their opponent there was some sort of celebration.  I can imagine that the gladiator stood over the vanquished and raised his sword to the sky while shouting with a hearty celebratory, raucous "Whoo hoo!"

While the exact language of the celebratory shout could differ from "Whoo hoo" you get the idea.  Its understandable if you think about it I mean this gladiator SURVIVED combat with another gladiator who was really trying to kill him.  Hey if some half-naked man wearing a helmet and is trying to poke me with a trident or swings a sword at me and I defeat that guy, I'm celebrating.

Let us advance a little in history to the kind of close to the present day but not and the gladiator games of the National Football League.  When I was growing up there were a few things you could be sure of when a player was tackled the other team never helped them up off of the ground.   By tackling that person and just getting up and walking away showed a sense of superiority over that player and helping them up made the tackler look weak.  The tackling team would get up and walk back to the huddle or sideline and they would act like it was something they did every day and at no time did they have to jump up and down, make up some stupid little celebratory dance or hop about like a duck on a hot plate (WKRP in Cincinnati reference).  Yes they may get "hi-fives" and yes they might be proud of their work but they acted like professionals.  Mark Gastineau, a defensive end for the New York Jets changed all of that.

That's really not fair, their were other other people that had celebrations (Billy "White Shoes" Johnson for example), but Gastineau did his celebratory "dance" after each sack.  The league didn't like it, nor did the teams he played against but it really seemed like that was a catalyst for defensive celebrations after anything they did.  Soon we had NFL players celebrating every sack, catch, first down, forced fumble, interception, tackle, punt and if you looked closely enough I'm guessing there have been celebrations for their first penalty.

Today its to the point where everyone does it and it makes them look dumb.  I can understand celebrating the "first" of any stat worthy action or game-winning play or a record-breaking stat (i.e., all time rusher, passer, etc.) but enough already.  I've been a Bear fan my entire life and I have seen some pretty great, humble performers that just do their job and after they do something, they get up and walk away like professionals.

I despise the type of player that feels compelled to dance about for no real reason and if you were to be near me when I was watching a game you would hear me say "Act like you have done that before" whenever a Bear (or any other player) decides to excessively celebrate the littlest thing.  I used to get so mad when Devin Hester would dance about because he scored a TD on a return or if he even had a long return without a score.  When Richard Dent sacked the QB he got up and walked back to the huddle unlike Jared Allen when he gets a sack and he does his "calf-roping" celebration, its silly and unnecessary.  Of all of the celebrations, Hester and Allen's are fairly mundane and are never of a concern to the physical well-being of the player.

When the Detroit Lions and the Green Bay Packers played on Sunday, September 21st, 2014 the unthinkable happened.  Stephen Tulloch the starting MLB of the Detroit Lions got a sack on Aaron Rodgers of the Packers and following the sack Tulloch celebrated the sack and subsequently  injured his knee.  The injury was knee serious enough that Tulloch was placed on the season-ending disabled list.  Despite the fact that I am a Bear fan it is with a certain level of anger that I look at the loss of he player for the Lions.  Stupidity is a terrible reason to get hurt and now his actions have affected the season of the Lions.

If you watch football on any level, whether college or professional (hopefully not high school) you will see players jump onto piles of their players because they did something noteworthy but you also see "chest-bumping" or tackling teammates for whatever reason but the potential for injury should preclude the actions because of simple common sense.  The potential for injury while celebrating a performance that they make all of the time is asinine.

Despite the fact that such behavior has become commonplace in the NFL it thereby diminishes any potential "mind games" against an opponent thus accomplishing little more than making the celebrator look like a fool.  Another possible consequence would be making your opponent angry enough that they use it as motivation to embarrass the self-important lackey.  While such actions could be construed as simple, easily forgotten actions by a player that has overvalued their own importance, said actions could result in a negative response by their opponent thus cementing said opponent to bring forth the pain upon the self-indulgent performer.  Such actions are not mere whimsical fantasy by any stretch of the imagination.  A former NFL "bad boy" that played for the St. Louis Cardinals used to dole out his own special justice to defensive players that got on his bad side.  Conrad Dobler was notorious for special treatment to opposing players that tried to show his team up, or at times for just appearing on the field.

I would tend to think that the best way to really get under the skin of your opponent following a "celebratory action" would be to complete the play, get up and walk away without the fanfare.  If a player were involved with multiple plays in a game, or a season for that matter and they acted as if it those actions were common as the coming dawn that would bother an opponent even more.  If a player were to perform at such a level without pomp and circumstance that would cement their impression into the psyche of the people they were playing against.

I could care less about sportsmanship (shaking hands with their opponents or helping them up), but by acting like the world revolves around them through dancing and shaking their asses they open themselves up to the microscope of the NFL.  If you act like you've been there before then people will develop a healthy respect for you and what that means in the context of the NFL is that you will be under their skin and in their conscious mind.

To those players that still think stupid celebrations make you a better player, you would be wrong.  Show up, do your job and act like professionals because if you don't you will expose your skills and jeopardize all at the same time.  That is all. -----
_________________________________________

Note:  I forgot to post this when I wrote it just a few weeks ago BUT it has become even more relevant to me as a Chicago Bears fan.  Today the Bears lost to the New England Patriots by the score of 51 - 23 and in the fourth quarter of the game a Chicago Bear player, Lamarr Houston, made one of the absolutely STUPID mistakes ever.  I'm serious, EVER.  The Bears DE made a sack with his team down 25 points, TWENTY-FREAKING-FIVE POINTS and he jumped up in the air in some type of celebration and upon landing he got hurt.  TWENTY-FREAKING-FIVE POINTS.  It's stupid, unnecessary, and asinine.  You Mr. Houston made yourself out to be a buffoon.  Can I make a small suggestion?  If your season is over because of the knee injury you suffered, give the money back to the Bears because your season has been a joke since it started and you have successfully proven to the fans of the Bears that you are not a professional and that you are not a team player.

Sad.

Monday, October 6, 2014

My Beloved Bears

Well it seems as if Sunday was as crappy as the last Sunday for me.  The Chicago Bears, my favorite team since the third grade, lost a 14 point lead to the Carolina Panthers and subsequently lost the game by seven points.  Failures about in that game and its brutally obvious that the team still needs safeties and linebackers desperately.

The Bears linebacking corps is horrific.  Lance Briggs is struggling, DJ Williams is kind of missing in many plays, and the remaining LB's aren't worth their weight in salt.

The defense is so bad I think some Division II schools could score on them.  Wow.  Just WOW.

Tuesday, September 16, 2014

Me, Myself and I

Let's get back to the good old fashioned rant shall we.  What kind of man asks a question to a fourteen year old boy about another man?  Here's the scenario...  You have a man in his FIFTIES ask a child, yes a child about a condition that his uncle may have in a rhetorical sense.  Rhetorical meaning he wasn't expecting an answer instead it was more like a jab at a situation he knows nothing about.  What a dick and what a pussy.  Why not grow a pair of balls and ask the other adult yourself or are you that big of a pussy?  That too is a rhetorical question because we already know the answer now don't we.

Only a coward tries to address a problem in that fashion and he's fairly lucky someone doesn't punch him in the face.  I hate cowards, and I really hate those cowards that involve other people, children for example, in their greater act of pussification.

Monday, September 15, 2014

Child Abuse, Domestic Violence and the NFL

When I wrote about domestic violence, Ray Rice and the NFL I stated that I am a HUGE fan of the NFL, I love the game and I really enter a different state of mind when the season starts.  As I wrote the article on domestic violence and Mr. Rice I literally held back the venom that makes me special.  I seemed to forget about the reason I have this blog, its a cathartic release of anger at the terminally stupid and those events that the terminally stupid actively participate in.

On Sunday, September 14th, 2014 the Minnesota Vikings announced that their star running back, Adrian Peterson, was deactivated following his indictment for child abuse.  It was revealed that Peterson disciplined his child with a "switch" or a length of pliable stick, willow has always seemed to be a great candidate for switch material.  Peterson acknowledged that as a child he was disciplined with a switch and if I'm being honest so have thousands upon thousands of others.

I would be remiss if I didn't say that children need to be disciplined, a good swift swat on the hind quarters will remind a child that whatever their actions did that was wrong has consequences.  On that note that doesn't mean beating the crap out of a child because they forgot to take out the garbage or because today is Thursday and they deserve it.  Discipline is a fickle little entity that has divine consequences and if used at an appropriate level is, or at least should be accepted.  While it was, and in some parts still is acceptable to use a switch a child social norms dictate that it isn't.

Was the rationality of Peterson using a switch on his child acceptable?  Probably not but therein lies the real issue.  While a child may fear a single swat on their butt on occasion, think about how terrifying it is for a child to first of all know they are going to get disciplined with a long stick.  Not only is it a stick but when swung with any velocity will make a terrifying whistle through the air before it hits the child.  It has to if its going to be effective otherwise it would be like a tap with a long pencil and it wouldn't garner any "desired effects" to deter that behavior.

Obviously child abuse can be perpetrated through the use of any item being used whether it be the palm of a hand, wooden spoon, switch, coffee cord, razor strop or a plethora of other items but the fact of the matter is that child abuse is wrong and must be taken seriously.  There is no reason whatsoever that makes child abuse acceptable.  None.  Within the issue at hand Peterson did significant physical and psychological damage to his son that can become a trigger for future abuse by Peterson and his own child.

Zygi Wilf and Mark Wilf, the owners of the Minnesota Vikings released the following statement:

Today’s decision was made after significant thought, discussion and consideration. As evidenced by our decision to deactivate Adrian from yesterday’s game, this is clearly a very important issue. On Friday, we felt it was in the best interests of the organization to step back, evaluate the situation, and not rush to judgment given the seriousness of this matter. At that time, we made the decision that we felt was best for the Vikings and all parties involved.

To be clear, we take very seriously any matter that involves the welfare of a child. At this time, however, we believe this is a matter of due process and we should allow the legal system to proceed so we can come to the most effective conclusions and then determine the appropriate course of action. This is a difficult path to navigate, and our focus is on doing the right thing. Currently we believe we are at a juncture where the most appropriate next step is to allow the judicial process to move forward.

We will continue to monitor the situation closely and support Adrian’s fulfillment of his legal responsibilities throughout this process.

Really?  So does that mean he can come back and play a game that pays him $11,750,000 a YEAR?  The league has real issues with the fine line between was is correct socially and what is correct monetarily.  Its okay to think that everything is great and right in the world because he sees the error of his ways but the big picture shows that one game doesn't mean squat.  It is obvious that if big-ticket players screw up then the NFL does NOTHING of consequence within the realm of discipline.  The assumed transparency of the legal system within the NFL is as transparent as muddy water.  For years people have talked about stars getting away with anything inside the league whilst they are awaiting prosecution or resolution of legal matters.

Its abhorrent to think that the culture of violence that drips from the leaky roof of the NFL onto the heads of its fan base.  The drips are inconsequential until they become a nuisance to the people that sit below it.  It becomes apparent that the drips continue until such a time that the leaky roof becomes a gaping hole that the "roofers" or the NFL in this case, try to plug with paper, roofing tar and crossed fingers in hopes that it will hold.  The NFL needs to flex its muscles and proactively say that despite the fact that Peterson is a star, child abuse is not acceptable and they need to suspend him until such a time that a resolution of his court case is complete.

Within the culture of the NFL it is obvious that decisions such as suspensions for child abuse and domestic violence only occur following controversy.  Despite the fact that socially society has made leaps and bounds within the prosecution of abusers, the NFL still lags far behind.

As we look at the case against Peterson and his alleged abuse of his son we must keep in mind that culturally his methods for discipline aren't simply archaic, they are criminal.  Under no circumstances can we equate a simple slap on the butt and the use of a switch with multiple strikes from that switch.  A simple search on the internet will show through the magic of pictures the consequences of Peterson's actions.  For the NFL to save face they MUST resolve their own position in the case and subsequently they have to suspend this man until the end of the season at least or until the resolution of the case in the legal system.

This is a sickening, despicable act that a father committed against his own child.  I cannot find a way that I will ever respect this player.  Get it together Goodell, assert your power and control against this reprehensible offense.

Saturday, September 13, 2014

The CTA - An Adventure into the Bowels of Stupidity

I ventured into Chicago to attend "Riot Fest" a three day metal / punk / alternative music festival in Humboldt Park.  I have experience in Chicago, I lived and worked there and I have traveled on the CTA from time to time because of that and from some other personal trips and although those experiences were for the most part before electronic fares and the entire system was computerized the concepts are still the same.  With my experiences being some time back we decided to contact the CTA even before we began the trip because we had heard of a station being closed for repairs / remodeling as well as the unfamiliarity of the system.

During our conversations and email contacts with the CTA there was still confusion so we decided to ask questions of friends that live in Chicago, as well as the front desk at our hotel and we had a pretty good idea of what we had to do EXCEPT for one little issue.  I kid you not that every single contact with the CTA regarding the closure of the California station was literally avoided or poorly explained.  With the exception of one of our friends that gave us excellent assistance, no one could give a clear explanation of what the Blue Line did AT the California station so we decided to have a game time decision to determine what he had to do.

The first CTA employee we asked about the Blue Line told us that the train would stop BEFORE the closed station then we would have to walk to get a shuttle that would then take us to ANOTHER station where we could then take a bus.  The next employee said a very similar inaccuracy BUT they told us that we would have to stop before the station then walk to our destination because there was no shuttle.  We did ask a third employee and she was EXCELLENT as she not only made sure we got the appropriate three day passes but she also gave us this little nugget; she told us that the train goes PAST the California station and then she told us what station to get off at and then what bus we could take.  I kid you not, she was the first one of the day AND at least the first one out of three emails and two telephone calls to get us in the right direction.

Let's ponder another point for a moment and decide how worthless people in call centers tend to be.  We called the CTA Customer Service number today whereby we asked the same question but the person that we talked to had no idea about the train because she was on the bus side of the wonderful world of the CTA.  Fair enough, I totally understand that we made a mistake there BUT when we asked if she could transfer us to the appropriate department or give us the correct contact number she said "No."  Apparently she didn't know how to do that.  Yep, I said she didn't know how to do that.

After we got to the correct station today we exited the train and walked toward the exit of the station and we asked a question of the employees as to which direction to go to get to Humboldt Park and that answer has déjà vu written all over it, so I'll give a little back story to explain.  A few years ago we went to the Congress Theater in Chicago to see Death Angel / Testament and Anthrax and much like that day when we got off of the train we had to ask which direction to go and the CTA employee informed us a direction of travel with a flippant little wave of the hand and when I asked her to clarify the little wave was done with a head toss.  I followed those step by step directions and it took us several blocks out of the way and to fix the gaff I asked a very helpful valet at a restaurant who gave great directions that despite the fact he sent us through the darkest street in the city (there wasn't a freaking streetlight the entire way) we got to our destination.

Today we rolled the dice and asked a CTA employee where to go and she said well there was a bus we could have taken but she wasn't sure if that was the right direction of travel so she referred us to another employee because he "knew about those things."  I should have known better because the first thing he said was why not just walk instead of taking the bus because it wasn't that far.  Remembering the Congress Theater fiasco I asked him which way and he rather flippantly kind of brushed us away with a small hand gesture but I was ready for him so I used my own hand signal (no I didn't flip him off) to confirm the direction of travel and he said to "go to the next intersection down that way" and it was a couple of blocks from there.

So we followed young Zippy's directions and we went to the next intersection looking for those couple of blocks.  Once again those directions were wrong.  We followed the pinheads line of travel, then had to backtrack to a direction of travel that we came from, then we asked a woman walking and she gave us a route.  That "next block" bull the "Wonder Twin" gave us was four blocks, then we had to walk another three or four to the actual venue (which was then followed by a hike the entire length of the park to get to will-call).  You might think that would be an excellent conclusion now wouldn't you but nooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooo.

The rain and cold was really getting to me so we did bail a little early in an attempt to get warm so we waited for a bus to get us back to our car parked in a CTA lot.  After I watched a man vomit all over the enclosed bus stop and literally clear out everyone from that enclosed bus stop (they relocated in the rain with the rest of us), we decided to walk a little bit where we found a massive number of buses ready for the festival to close.  When we approached the bus I specifically asked if the bus dropped off at a Blue Line station he said yes and he told us a specific stop to get off at.  He was wrong.  We figured it out after we scared the crap out of another woman walking when we asked her for directions but we did get out train and we got back to the hotel.

As I look back at the excursion into CTA stupidity I ask myself is that job really that hard?  Shouldn't their employees have some sense of direction whereas a head toss doesn't take the place of legitimate assistance?  Can that job be that mind-numbing that they are so severely jaded that common sense or common courtesy are easily covered up with incompetency?  I realize that its easy to discount their lack of professionalism by saying that people like us are just dumb but isn't their job to assist?  Can it be said that simple questions such as closures or what a train does at that closure are so easy that their brains cannot function when trying to elicit a proper answer?

Following my evening medication (prescription medications) and a little decompression I reflected on the night and determined that all is well!  Two more days of killer bands, a couple more train and bus rides and probably another rant about someone else.