Well Kick Me In The Ass And Call Me Fred

Living in a town that is so full of douche bags makes getting through a day without burying one of them alive.  As an American citizen, should I be subjected to one ass that cannot delineate between one of his friends and his friends evil?  As a City employee, should he bitch about my house, lawn, car, dumpster or the large hole I'm digging as shelter from 2012 (I'm kidding about the car) and not bitch about his friend that has shit piled up right next to that douche bag's house?

You know what, I'm sorry but what's good for the goose is a reason to roast the gander.  Do your flipping job, you cannot ignore one and hold the other to a different standard.  Kiss my arse if I'll let that happen.

I've Just Been Awarded...

Sixteen MILLION dollars!  That's what the email said, and emails are never used for nefarious purposes.  That's not all, when I send them $350 they will send a courier to the address I am to provide to them!  To make sure its really me, I have to provide them with two pieces of identification (my Social Security Number and a copy of my Passport) then when I meet with the courier, they can be sure its really me and not some scam artist (their words)!

Picking Thine Nostrils

Is there anything more disgusting than seeing a child pick their nose?  I bet I know something that is, an ADULT doing it.  Yes an adult that picked his nose, then rubbed the green goo onto the side of the slot machine he was playing.

Really Ocifer, You Couldn't Turn Around And Help?

Last night my wife and our two children were traveling to Council Bluffs, IA for our vacation (yes I said Council Bluffs and yes I know its in Iowa)and whilst traveling to our hotel we suffered one Heck of a setback, we had a blowout.

The Crispy Pile Of Ash In The Front Seat Of A Prius

Why oh why must stupid people be given drivers licenses?  Obviously the tests are too easy or 95% of the people on the road would have failed and never been allowed to drive.  I'm fairly confident that each of the 95% need to be slapped in the side of the head with a large mallet.  There has to be a solution to the ignorance of these blister-headed idiots, and I think I might have an idea that will work.

The Latest Trip To The Land Of The Letter Between L And N

Being a glutton for punishment, I decided to travel the to the "goldish colored giant letter between L and N fast food establishment" to get another Iced Tea, and what I found shocked the crap out of me.

Try To Aggravate Me Is Like Trying to Make Ghandi Take A Swing At You

Aggravation is an art form that novices may attempt and will fail during the attempt, and although it might be possible to get under ones skin generally it won't last long.  I know, I have vast knowledge of aggravation and oh so much experience in it, I would be called a Master.