Wednesday, June 21, 2017

Foreclose My Car Loan?

I just talked to someone about my "car loan" and how I was going to be "foreclosed on" if I didn't immediately provide them with three payments using my credit card. Seriously. I started to laugh as I told him that they already took my car following my seventh DUI. I said if they wanted it they could talk to the local sheriff (sorry Ted) because after I totaled it and not having ANY insurance it was in their possession.

He believed me, but told me that it was going to be "foreclosed on" again and I asked him if the people foreclosing on it would visit me because I was lonely. I asked him what he was wearing and if he smelled good and there was a noticeable pause. 

I proceeded to ask if I could move in with him, and I then told him we could share a bed but I did have severe flatulence and I liked to cuddle and the pause continued. Somewhere in the next sentence as I began to ask him about goats he began screaming at me in a language that I cannot identify because I was now laughing so hard I was almost crying.

He told me I was a disgusting pig and hung up on me. Was it something I said? We had a great conversation for TEN minutes and then BOOM out of left field he begins screaming . Weird.

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