Monday, November 21, 2011

The Evil of the Prius

Yes I said evil.  I'm not sure what it is about the drivers in these little electric clown cars but they seem to be a tad bit aggressive.  Sure they may think they're "going green" and "saving the planet" but when you try to out run a fuel injected 350 V8 and I'm the driver, well lets just say that's not your best idea.

Sure you can think that the little piece of crap is cute and although you think you're helping the baby seals but when you try to pass a V8 that is blowing past you on a hill in doing so we are both putting enough greenhouse gases into the environment to kill that little seal and 50 polar bears.

Here's an idea for the Prius owners:  Back down there cheese because those of us that don't own those crap wagons outnumber you and we're bigger and meaner.  What does that mean you ask...  Keep it up and we'll jam you up that tailpipe so you can keep the hamsters in that "engine" company.  That is all.

Wednesday, November 2, 2011

The Fourth Moon of Jupiter

How does one address a bad incident when in the grand scheme of things that incident was merely a blip within it all?  That's why you're here, that's why I wrote about it and that is why birds sing (no not really).

Sunday, October 9, 2011

Really? I haven't had anything to bitch about?

That would be a great big NO!  New stuff approaches soon....  I'll probably have to bitch about myself and lack of attention I seem to have.

Thursday, August 11, 2011

Well Kick Me In The Ass And Call Me Fred

Living in a town that is so full of douche bags makes getting through a day without burying one of them alive.  As an American citizen, should I be subjected to one ass that cannot delineate between one of his friends and his friends evil?  As a City employee, should he bitch about my house, lawn, car, dumpster or the large hole I'm digging as shelter from 2012 (I'm kidding about the car) and not bitch about his friend that has shit piled up right next to that douche bag's house?

You know what, I'm sorry but what's good for the goose is a reason to roast the gander.  Do your flipping job, you cannot ignore one and hold the other to a different standard.  Kiss my arse if I'll let that happen.

Thursday, August 4, 2011

I've Just Been Awarded...

Sixteen MILLION dollars!  That's what the email said, and emails are never used for nefarious purposes.  That's not all, when I send them $350 they will send a courier to the address I am to provide to them!  To make sure its really me, I have to provide them with two pieces of identification (my Social Security Number and a copy of my Passport) then when I meet with the courier, they can be sure its really me and not some scam artist (their words)!

Sunday, July 17, 2011

Picking Thine Nostrils

Is there anything more disgusting than seeing a child pick their nose?  I bet I know something that is, an ADULT doing it.  Yes an adult that picked his nose, then rubbed the green goo onto the side of the slot machine he was playing.

Tuesday, July 12, 2011

Really Ocifer, You Couldn't Turn Around And Help?

Last night my wife and our two children were traveling to Council Bluffs, IA for our vacation (yes I said Council Bluffs and yes I know its in Iowa)and whilst traveling to our hotel we suffered one Heck of a setback, we had a blowout.

Sunday, July 10, 2011

The Crispy Pile Of Ash In The Front Seat Of A Prius

Why oh why must stupid people be given drivers licenses?  Obviously the tests are too easy or 95% of the people on the road would have failed and never been allowed to drive.  I'm fairly confident that each of the 95% need to be slapped in the side of the head with a large mallet.  There has to be a solution to the ignorance of these blister-headed idiots, and I think I might have an idea that will work.

Thursday, July 7, 2011

The Latest Trip To The Land Of The Letter Between L And N

Being a glutton for punishment, I decided to travel the to the "goldish colored giant letter between L and N fast food establishment" to get another Iced Tea, and what I found shocked the crap out of me.

Try To Aggravate Me Is Like Trying to Make Ghandi Take A Swing At You

Aggravation is an art form that novices may attempt and will fail during the attempt, and although it might be possible to get under ones skin generally it won't last long.  I know, I have vast knowledge of aggravation and oh so much experience in it, I would be called a Master.

Is it so hard?

Vague, sure it is, but give me a moment and I will explain in great detail.  I like iced tea, more importantly I really like the tea that they have at the goldish colored giant letter between L and N, but apparently they have no clue when it comes to customer service.

Sunday, July 3, 2011

Why...

Why in the bloody Heck after you pass someone they decide that they have to pass you back and then slow down so you have to pass them again!  I took a trip to Park Falls, WI today (absolutely beautiful place BTW) and I found a person that I think might need to have their license taken from them and jammed down their throat.

Tuesday, June 28, 2011

Customer Service

Whatever happened to "customer service"?  Should I have to wait 10 minutes for an iced tea and a hot fudge sundae at a mecca of fast foodiness?  Surely the giant M can hire people that can handle TWO cars can't they? 

On a related note, when did straws become an endangered species?  If I order any type of liquid from the mecca, I rarely get anything that resembles a straw, ergo they must be endangered.  Please contact your congress-(wo)man and DEMAND that straws be placed on the endangered list!  If you don't, future generations will go without straws!

Wednesday, April 20, 2011

Chupacabras, Doggies, Horsies and Morons

I am fairly eclectic in the things I watch on television, I lean toward reality type programs (no not like Survivor or Celebrity Apprentice), shows that teach or show people doing something, Deadliest Catch for instance.  My tastes do draw me toward shows based on paranormal, monsters, ghosts and things of a similar nature, and this evening I decided to watch a program that really has agitated me.

Tuesday, April 19, 2011

WTF

I'm starting to get into this blog thing, I sure hope I don't say something stupid to get the wrong type of attention.  Sure, like I care.